I don't ever recall having the "talk". It seemed my step-dad had given me a choice. Girls or guitars. Seeing that I had made a choice, my step-dad saved his breath.
He figured any young man who would spend hours with an overly developed young lady wearing a cheer leaders version of a sailor suit, just listening to Chicago records (and one Phoebe Snow LP), would never need to have the talk.
I feel like I want to say that I was a late bloomer, but a late bloomer for what? Am I required to consort at a certain age?
When I was in six grade I met a girl I liked. She was the cutest girl in school as far as I was concerned. I couldn't wait to take her home to meet my folks. After they met her, my step-dad later said to me, "Your friend looks like Tiny Tim".
I wasn't mature enough to ignore it. I was shattered. Not that there's anything wrong with looking like "Tiny Tim", but now whenever I looked at her, she was replaced with the ukulele troubadour . I held that against my step-dad for a while and I hated Tiny Tim after that as well.
I became more consumed with music after that. When you spend most of your time in your room practicing and becoming a dedicated neighborhood band leader, I suppose it could effect ones social development. I wasn't too bad, but when it came to the opposite sex, I was too shy, too naive, I just couldn't read the signals. And whenever I thought I could read them, the signal always said "Get out of my face". So I never had a girl friend or I wasn't aware that I had. I certainly never asked anyone, I would have been too shy for that.
When I was in high school I met a young lady, she was as sweet as she was cute. And she didn't look like Tiny Tim. We spent a lot of time together. We went bike riding once, I lead us on a route where we ended up pedaling toward traffic on the expressway. We survived.
I couldn't imagine flattering myself into thinking that she would officially go out with me. So I never asked. That's how it's done, right? "Will you go out with me?"
I ran into her 30 years later, she hadn't changed at all. I wasn't sure how to comfortably catalogue our friendship and memories. So I asked, "Um… Err… Did we actually go out?" "Were we uhhhh… boyfriend and girlfriend?" She was so PISSED. I didn't know she was my girlfriend. "Really?" "We hooked up?" You can do that without asking?
Apparently I hadn't changed much either.
I had my first official girlfriend in Geneseo. She came to my apartment one day and never left. I guess we're going out.